Wanted: Single Female Flatmate in Gurgaon

With great hope and optimism I put up an ad
Looking for a single female flatmate it declared
You see the recessionary blues warrant me to share my expense
Plus some company, maybe a friend or a helping hand were driving my sense
So, the ad was put up and I started getting calls from unknown numbers
At work during the day, sometimes in the evening waking me up from my slumbers

‘Hello, is the flat available on rent? Can I come to see it? Says one female voice
And I tell her about the woodwork, the pool view making all the right noise
The doorbell rings and this girl comes in, her perfume fills my house
She takes a look around the kitchen and checks if there’s a mouse
‘How do you live by yourself in this big high place?’
‘Single- don’t you feel scared?’ she says making a face
‘Well and so I’m looking for a flatmate’ I offer with a smile
I add ‘You will like it if you want to live in style’
‘Hmm...the rent is steep’ there she goes
‘You got to share minimum 50%’ I say and curl my toes

And so females come and go
While I keep curling my poor toe
22 year olds who ask if they can have boys over
28 year olds who tell there’s an errant husband who makes them cower
Also a 32 year old who quit her job and shared with me her business plan
Good response but a de-attached toilet influences decisions and bags all the attention span


So, in the meanwhile I hear a male voice who asks me if he can come over and have a look
You are crazy I tell him or are you a crook?
No, I just saw Dostana and was wondering if this can happen in real life
In any case I am safe because I am married and on weekends will have my wife
Hmmm...interesting I think for a moment...at least I will get my rent
And how in today’s world does it matter if it’s a lady or a gent

So I think and ponder what to do – can you pls tell
And I see there’s another unknown number ringing on my cell..